Two years ago this morning I was standing in the doorway of John's critical care unit. He was on life support and I was looking at the hustle bustle in the nurse's station.
Many of you were praying for John's recovery and recover, he did. To God be the glory!
But that morning of April 1, what I was thinking was "if this is an April fool's joke, it is not funny."
Today, I again ask for prayer for me. I have PSTD where it comes to my man. I find myself reliving the episode and it hurts as much now as it did then.
I just need support today. Thanks all....I love you all.
May God bless each of you today in a special way that you know that from Him all blessings flow. For me, he gave a faint rainbow. Can you find it?
Oh hon, you know you have my prayers, love, and support always. Hugs. Every time we have a cancer scan I go through the horror of learning about Jim's cancer. You know, if we didn't love these stupid men so much it wouldn't be near so hard. But love them we do and because we do, we will and can be strong for them. Love you. Hugs.
ReplyDeleteThanks Sandie, hugs right back at you
DeleteYou're living in the blessing of days you feared would be lost forever and those often feel so fragile - nothing more wonderful and painful than love :-). Find your peace, celebrate your time. No Foolin', you've got this.
ReplyDeleteJodee, you are so right about fragile days. Love is strange, isn't it.
DeleteYes it is hard for us to relive those horrors but it does make us stronger. We Thank God when things have a positive outcome and then ask why things didn't turn out more favorable when the outcome is negative. Both Kathy and I have face the negative but as I said it makes us cherish every moment we share together.
ReplyDeleteBe Safe and Enjoy!
It's about time.
Thanks Rick and Kathy, Yep, reliving does not make the pain any weaker, but it does make me even more determined to keep him healthy.
DeleteWhen things do not work out and the outcome is negative, I have learned to say thank you God. He has a better way than all my silly plans.
Prayers coming your way!!!
ReplyDeleteHere come a few more. I've been there and can imagine what you're going through.
ReplyDeleteThanks. I am sorry that you had to be in this spot too. It is a huge learning experience and it teaches patience and faith.
DeleteI see your rainbow Nan and am wishing you all the best. It's a hard road to hoe loving someone whose health is precarious.
ReplyDeleteI am glad that you could find the rainbow Sherry. We both just hand in there, don't we.
DeleteI remember being there with you in love and prayers. To God be the Glory always. I am with you today in prayer, thought and friendship!
ReplyDeleteI remember your words of encouragement. They were and still are dear to me.
Delete"Be still and know that I am God" comes to mind. Praying for you, Nan!
ReplyDeleteThanks Carol.
DeleteMore prayers are coming you way, hang in there!
ReplyDeleteGeorge, we are thankful for your prayers.
DeleteAlthough I am a day late, I am sending prayers your way. I certainly understand those feelings when your companion is dealing with health issues.
ReplyDeleteIt is never too late to pray. Thank you.
DeleteNan, a quote came to mind when I read your post, "Don't look backward, it's not the way you are going." I have often said to myself that had Rich lived I'd live every moment to it's fullest. I would waste no time on worry or regret. I would have considered it the greatest gift I ever received just to have one more moment with him-I would have given up my life for just that one moment.
ReplyDeleteI know it's hard not to worry about John, but remember, You can't have a positive and a negative thought in your mind at the same time-I hope you can concentrate on the happy moments. When you find yourself worrying, try to replace the worry with a good thought or tell him you love him-don't let that moment go to waste.
Great words of encouragement. Thank you so much.
DeleteI remember those days, Nan, and how much you went through and how strong you have been. Everyone needs a little meltdown now and then after something like that. I am glad you have friends near and far who send both of you good wishes and prayers, including me
ReplyDeleteYes Sue, I remember your encouragement and positive thoughts. Well, I have had my meltdown and am doing fine once again.
DeleteI can't see the rainbow but I know it is always there. God Bless.
ReplyDeletePhyllis, I love your comment. You KNOW it is there.....we call that faith, don't we.
DeleteSometimes a painful memory is needed to help us remember not only how great God is but how much we must depend on him daily. It increases our faith to know that without God's daily blessings, we wouldn't have anything.
ReplyDeleteRemember, rainbows are a promise from God.
You are so right. If life were to just run smoothly all the time, we would not need a God to watch over us and guide us through life.
ReplyDelete