How many times have you told your exceedingly patient friend, your long-suffering spouse, or your totally impatient child a story only to hear, "you already told me that", or maybe from that child, "you've told me that at least a dozen times!"
What can I say. Is it a matter of memory? My memory? Surely not! Why does one (do I) repeat and repeat and repeat themselves (myself)? Do I feel the receiver of this important fact will not pay attention to what I have to say? And it is important, you know.... Or is it that I value the happiness of the other person so much that I want to help them. (weather or not they have asked for said help.)
Now, when I start to tell a story, I have learned, and sometimes remember to preface my story with "have I already said..... ..... ....?" If they say yes, then "nuff said". (hoping that they get the point I was going to try to make.) Really not funny, is it?
A few years ago, our youngest daughter was to get married in August. August is a very hot month around here and I knew staying cool was very important.
BUT.....we had been to a wedding in June. The bride also wanted to remain cool resulting is skipping putting on a slip, petticoat, or whatever they are now called that piece. And this resulted in the guests ability to view a dazzling bride with her bikini underwear showing right through her gown!
Sooooooooooo, I proceeded to tell our daughter about this not once, not twice, I don't know how many times, not remembering that I had told her once! Time after time, she would remind me that I had told her about this before. First she was patient. Then she was, should I say....MOM! you've told me this! not so patiently!
I have been thinking about this habit of mine. I have decided it is either an OCD problem, (obsessive compulsive disorder), or it is a control issue. What do you think?
Does this happen to you? Does it devalue what you are trying to say? Should you have said it in the first place? Just wondering.
By the way, ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, have I tell you this??????????
Be safe! God Bless.....
For me, it boils down to this .... I just plain ol' forget! Unless the recipient of my wise words might be one of my kids, and then I was being plain ol' get-it-through-your-thick-skull motivated!
ReplyDeleteI'm a repeater too. I try not to, but I will tell the same story or give the same information about what happened today, or yesterday more than once.
ReplyDeleteIt has nothing to do with age. I did the same when I was in my 20's
I think we tell people things, but forget exactly who we've told. If I'm telling a story I know I've told before, I say, "Stop me if I've already told you this..." Because it really IS hard sometimes to sit through the same story two or three times. But I usually won't tell the person if I'm the listener.
ReplyDelete